It is 2014. Why? Because it was 2013 exactly 365 days ago. Ok, now that we’re done with that, these are some of the depressing/amusing/annoying/irritating/next random adjective things still happening on the internet in 2014. In other words, it is 2014 and we the people are still:
1. Outraging at hind limb in oral orifice comments of people known to the world a little more than us and our Twitter followers
2. Engaging in sly tweet wars
3. Poking fun at movie stars body anomalies
4. Leaving Twitter because of random reasons like no.3
5. Making heart-shaped signs at EDM concerts
6. Going to EDM concerts
7. Displaying their mediocrity online [like this blog] in the name of ‘art’ or more esoteric words
8. Posting pictures of their misspelt names on Starbucks coffee cups [most of y’all make that up anyway]
9. Taking part in and organising hashtag-based Twitter contests
10. Tweeting with this hashtag – #ForeverAlone [while at a gathering to really ensure their stuck in phone screen hearts and minds are disowned for real by their friends and family]
11. Drunk tweeting [seriously?]
12. Creating confession pages [because no.2 wasn’t enough]
13. Writing Namo4Pm in Twitter bios [what, I thought social media had made him PM already?]
14. Tweeting about traffic
15. Tweeting about more traffic
16. Still tweeting about traffic
17. Engaging in Dalli Roxx vs Bombay Suxx online wars
18. Doling out lovemaking advice, because only eggs get laid, c’mon!
19. Reading Thought Catalog articles
20. Reading 67 Things on Buzz Feed articles [meta alert! meta alert!]
21. Counting down to their birthdays [aww it’s okay we get it]
22. Making bucket lists
23. Pretending to be anonymous on 17 different social media accounts
24. Tweeting about weather
25. Tweeting about rainy weather
26. Tweeting about rainy + chilly weather
27. Trying to win imaginary wordplay championships
28. Aggregating profoundly out of depth and unoriginal stuff on their ‘social media ventures’
29. Taking selfies
30. Still reading my blog [well, yay]
Do I hate the peeps who do the above? Not really, because I’ve indulged in and still, on occasions, in a lot of those. And some of you are really good at it while you’re at it. But then, it is 2014. Anyway.
Slow & Unsteady 